What you want and What You need are very Different
by Amitee
Summary: Marissa and Summer lay side by side in the hospital, both very aware that their husbands are cheating. One day the worst and the best thing happen to Summer at the exact same time Soon Summer is making some very serious choices R for suicide, homicide,sex
1. Default Chapter

**This is a darker fanfic with a touch of romance and plenty of angst. (Like, duh!)**

**Summary- Marissa is diagnosed with a rare bone disease and is literally wasting away in a hospital bed while her husband Ryan struggles to take care of his two teenage daughters. When he hires a woman to help him out, how surprised will he be when old friend Anna Stern shows up at his door? What happens when a scandelous romance erupts between the two? **

**Mini-plot = Seth and Summer are finally back from their honeymoon. how will Summer tell Seth that she's pregnant with triplets?**

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"Seth? We're out of sliced organic peaches!" Summer Cohen yelled. It was 1:00 am and the Cohens had just got back from their honeymoon in Bora Bora.

"What? Summer it's 1 am. Go to sleep!" Seth muttered while dragging in his wifes overstuffed suitcase.

"Seth! I have this ridiculous craving for sliced organic peaches. And you know I had one too many Martinis on the flight! I can't get them myself!" Summer pouted her lips, which were frosted with the latest colored glaze.

"Summer. Go to sleep." Seth flicked off his bedroom light and flopped on the bed. Summer sighed and changed into her silk teddy. She cuddled up next to her husband.

"Seth?" she whispered.

"Whaaaattt?" He whined groggily.

"I really REALLY want some sliced organic peaches."

** THE NEXT MORNING**

Marissa Atwood wobbled as she attempted to walk down the stairs in her spanish style mansion of a house. Her twin 5 year olds were quietly playing barbies in their playroom.

_They're so quiet just like their father. Thank God!_ Marissa thought. She sat down at the top of the steps to catch her breath. _I've been so out of it lately._ Marissa sat for awhile savoring the silence. She looked at her watch and gasped.

"Amity, Ava lets go. We're going to be late for Uncle Seth and Aunt Summers barbecue." Marissa called from the top of the steps. She stood up and grasped her head. The room was spinning and bright colored spots flooded Marissa's eyes. She felt herself sway and then suddenly plunge foward. and then Everything went dark.........

**30 minutes later**

Ryan Atwood stared at the stack of papers on his desk at the Orange County Law Office. His eyes were glazed over, and he had dark circles under his eyes. Ryan had recently sunk into a midday slump. He was, however, jolted out of his stupor by a ringing phone in the backround. It sounded awfully close...

"Damn!" Ryan yelled when he realized it was his phone.

"Hi daddy." Came the soft voice of Ryans 5 year old little girl Ava.

"Ava, daddy's a little busy. Can we talk later" Ryan sighed and glanced at the pile of papers leering at him.

Ava's voice trembled

"I'm sorry daddy." Suddenly there was a muffled "Wait!" and then Ryan heard the voice of the more bossy half of the twins, Amity.

"Daddy, mommy fell down the stairs and her lips are blue and she wont get up. We're gonna be late for Unca Seth an' Auntie Summer's barbie-Q!" She whined.

"Oh my god! I'll be right there baby!" Ryan slammed down the phone and grabbed his car keys.

Ch. 2 will be up quite soon....Please Review!!!!

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	2. Grand Theft Auto

**Sigh...I own none of this.....Damn you Josh Schwartz! Also, Luekonyskia is not real for all i know....**

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**Summary so far- Marissa has fallen down the stairs, and Summer is having mad cravings....**

** Prolouge**

Ryan Atwood was not easily scared.He wasnt scared when his mother would threaten him with knives, he wasnt scared when police held guns to his head. But when he saw those ice cold blue lips, and blood forming under his stick thin wifes eyes, he was terrified. He scooped up her fragile body. And, if you could stop time at this exact second, you would see a tear roll down his cheek.

**_Chapter Two_**

"Mr. Atwood?" Came the strict, no-nonsense voice of Dr. Narigon Vindi.

"Yeah?" Ryan stood up, glad to get away from the stiff hospital waiting room chairs. 

"Please follow me." Ryan followed the doctor, eyes locked on her black sashaying ponytail. she led him into a hospital room where he saw Marissa propped up on several pillows, still as pale as can be. Ryan reluctantly sat down in another stiff chair.

"Mr. Atwood, Mrs. Atwood, I have some bad news. We checked the tests and it turns out Marissa has a rare bone disease called Luekonyskia. Your bones are gradually wearing away and blood is forming under your skin. We just recently discovered this disease, it is the sister disease of Hemophilia(I think I spelled that right.)." Dr. Vindi looked like she had more to say, be kept quiet.

"Is there something else to say, Dr. Vindi?" Ryan inquired.

"Well, yes. We beleive we know how to correct it, but the price is very high. It's either that or..." As Dr. Vindi trailed off she looked away from the young couple.

"Or what?" Ryan demanded.

"Or death." Dr. Vindi sucked in her breath.

"How long do I have to live?" Came the abnormally whispery voice of Marissa Atwood.

"Six, eight months... a year at the latest but that is unlikely.

"We'll do whatever it takes to save her." Ryan said deftly.

**Seth and Summers BBQ**

Summer weaved in and out of guests, smiling and waving. _We're is Marissa and Ryan?_ Summer thought. She gave up on the backyard and retreated to the living room where Seth was playing Grand Theft Auto with Marissa's twin girls Ava and Amity.

"Seth!" Summer smacked him on the back of the head.

"Whaattt???!!!"

"We have a whole party going on outside and you're in here playing video games?"

"Look, it's a favor for Ryan. I'm watching the twins!" Summer looked at him like he had said the sky was green.

"Where is Ryan and Marissa anyway?" Summer glanced around the living room.

"Umm...Marissa fell down the stairs and they had to go to the hospital. She wasnt breathing, her lips were blue,you know. Standard everyday stuff."

"WHAT? Coop's in the hospital?" Summer shrieked. Seth jumped up.

"Really? We should go visit her!" He said like it was the first time he heard it.

"Oh and by the way, you can't call her Coop anymore. She's Marissa ATWOOD now." Seth yelled as Summer dragged him out the door, slamming it behind her. The twins heard a muffled lament.

"Summer? Summer? SUMMER? My shoelace is caught...."


	3. Faded

Anna Stern brushed away her long bleach blond hair from her eyes as she read the classified ads. Her eyes fell upon an ad seeking a nanny.

"Married male seeks nanny for 5 year old twins. 183 Bella Court." Anna sipped up the last of her frap and threw down some change on the oak table. She was clad in a long red organza skirt and black halter top. She was cluthing a large pink Cherry Blossom Louis Vuitton bag she had gotten during her short employment at the now defunct boutique on Melrose.

"Bella Court, here I come" Were the words she uttered as she swept out of the shop.

Anna was out of work, out of money,car-less and, unfortuantley, homeless. She hoped this job would pay well, so she could at least get an apartment.

Things had changed since she had last been in OC. That was in High School. She let her hair grow long, to her waist. She no home, no friends, no family. Her aunt and uncle had commited joint suicide 4 days before she arrived. The had drowned thenselves in the ocean.

Anna scanned the numbers on Bella Courts mansions. 179, 181, 183! She walked quickly up and rang the doorbell. A young girl opened the huge doors.

"Hiiii!" She said half shyly, half excitedly.

"Hi! Is your daddy home?" Anna said softly. Despite the grin plastered on the girls face, there was extreme sadness in her eyes.

"Uh-huh. My name is Ava." The girl added, retreating up a long, circular staircase. A couple seconds later, the girl returned, but with a puzzled look on her face.

"What are you doing here?" The girl asked.

"Huh? I just asked you if your father was home. Is he?" A split second later another girl sidled up to the door. That's when it hit Anna-they were twins.

"Ava?" She said to the air.

"Thats me!" The girl with the bow in her hair squealed.

"Oh. whats your name?" Anna asked the other girl.

"Arity. That's Ah-Ree-Tee. But everyone calls me Ari." She said a matter of factly.

"Hi Ari. I just asked Ava if your father was home." Anna glanced around, starting to wonder if the girls had a father. Suddenly a voice was heard echoing from the hall.

"Arity? Ava? The TV is fixed." A young man walked up to the door, smiling down at the girls who rushed to the right of the staircase.

"I'm here about-" Anna stopped as she looked harder at the man. A name softly escaped her lips.

"Ryan.." She looked at him with an incredolous look on his face.

"Oh. Do I know you?" He said with a fake cheery smile on his face.

"Um...Anna Stern?" Anna pulled her hair away from her face and behind her head.

"Anna?! Oh my gosh. It's so great to see you. Hey Seth!! Come here!" The color in Anna's face drained.

"Seth is here? Uh-oh. I must look horrible. This is so0o0o embarrasing.." Anna ranted on.

Seth walked up to Ryan and looked him in the eye not noticing Anna.

"What? Why are smiling that lopsided grin. Stop that, I'm feeling violated." Ryan pointed to Anna.

"Hi nice to meet you. Ryan what's-" Seth looked back at Anna.

"Anna?!" Seth, not thinking, grabbed Anna and kissed her. And not a hello kiss, a real full on lip locker.

"Seth, remember that ring on your finger?" Seth pulled away. At a good time, because Summer walked out.

"Anna?" Summer grinned.

"Yep." The girls screeched and hugged. As they broke the embrace, anna looked at the reunited group happily. Except-

"Where's Marissa?" Anna asked. A long silence fell across the room.

"I'm right here." Marissa leaned on the door frame. She had lost so much weight, and her hair was not its usual shiny mass of golden perfection. It was limp and plain. Her skin was paler and her eyes lost their sparkle. Marissa coughed harshly, ignoring the blood that splattered on her hand.

"Marissa..." Tears welled in Annas eyes.

"I'm faded." Marissa whispered.


	4. Breaking The News Part 1

Chappy Four!

Breaking the News Part 1

After the less then joyous reunion, Anna was immediatley hired. Seth and Summer said hasty good byes, and Seth handed Anna his adress and phone number on a slip of paper.

"Dont be a stranger" he whispered into her ear. Summer and Anna hugged and cried.

"I missed you! Beleive it or not..." Summer trailed off. Anna grinned and stifled a sob. Sum and Seth waved goodbye and drove off in the Jeep Wrangler they recently bought together.

"So, where do you live?" Ryan asked as he ushered Anna into the foyer of their spanish style mansion. Anna blushed.

"Well, I...dont really...um, how do i put this...I'm a homeless bum?" Anna tried to crack a joke, but Ryan could see how ashamed and sad she was by looking in her eyes.

"No problem. You can have the guest floor." Ryan said nonchalantly.

"Guest...**_floor?!_**" Anna said incredulousley.

"Yeah. Isn't it nice?" Marissa appeared at the top of the staircase. She had fled to her room after the "faded" comment.

"It's gorgeous, but i cant beleive I'll have a whole floor to myself!" Anna said softly.

"We converted the attic so that it includes a master bedroom, full master bath, living room with a flat screen plasma TV and a kitchen fited with all the appliances you'll ever need." Came the small voice of Ari Atwood, who was standing next to her mother. Ava had become very attached to Anna and was now clinging to the Raspberry colored skirt Anna sported.

"Wow. Thats cool, how did you memerize that?" Anna said sweetly.

"Who are you anyway!?" Ari said icily. For a five year old at least.

"I'm Anna, i'm going to help out your daddy by taking care of you when he and your mom are, uh, busy." Anna said in a hurt tone.

"You mean while mom is in the hospital. I know shes going to die! And i dont like you. Your weird looking." Ari said, tears suddenly streaming down her cheeks.

Marissa had a blank look in her eyes. She looked down coldly at Anna.

"First comes the replacement." Marissa said cryptically.

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Back at the Cohen household, Summer was twirling her hair absentmindedly.

"Summer, when you twirl your hair it means your not telling me somethimg. Spill it." Seth stood behind her as she sat looking into the vanity mirror.

"Triplets." summer said softly.

"Huh? Whoi has triplets? Not Ryan. Those are twins honey. Triplets are when you have three kids at once. This is why you shouldn't have skipped Sex Ed to go to the Gucci Sunglasses sale in 9th grade." Seth rambled. Summer turned around, scrunching up her face.

"You remember that?" She asked.

"Yeah. So?" Seth grinned.

"Well, what if we had triplets?" Summer tried to be nonchalant.

"What do you mean, what if? There is no what if with triplets, my dear. You cant plan those things." Seth said dumbly. Summer stared at him, as if to say,

_"I'm Having triplets dummy!_"

"Wait a minute..are you?" Something gleamed in Seths eyes.

"Cohen i'm pregnant. With triplets, to answer your next question." Summer cracked a smile.

All of a sudden Seth looked like a 9 year old boy who just got the red bike he asked wanted for Christmas...er, Hannukah.

"Yesssss!!!!!! Summer thats great!!!! Woohooo!!!!! Oh my god! I get to be a dad!!!!!" He grabbed Summer and twirled her around the room.

Summer smiled. But deep inside there was a pain. Like a hole in her heart.

And she knew exactly why.

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"Look, you either got the money, or you dont. Its tha' simple Terry. Ya either do, or ya don'." A tall man with dark shades and an earring ring said coldly.

"For the last time dont call me Terry!" A beautiful woman with glorious raven black hair and deep olive skin shot back. She was clutching the hand of a golden blonde 10 year old girl.

"Wheres the money, woman? " The tall man growled.

"I...I dont have it." The raven haired woman said weakly.

"Boys. We need to solve this problem. I think you know how." Out of the shadows of the alley, 3 men appeared, clad in black. The woman leaned down and whispered something in the girls ear. Then, in a loud, brave voice she told the girl:

"Tell him who you are. Go!" The girl started to run. One of the men in black went to run after her, but the tall man stopped him.

"Worry about Terry over here." He said in an amused voice.

"My name aint Terry. It's Theresa!" The woman screamed.

A/n- Ha! Didnt see that coming did you! R&R! Im back everyone!!! My computer crashed and we got a new one and i just realized how to upload with notepad and not microsoft word!

Lu ya!


	5. Breaking the News Part II

Breaking The News, Part II

"Honey, did you hear the doorbell ring?" Marissa said softly. It was after midnight.

"You heard it too?" Ryan whispered. Marissa nodded.

"Who, besides a rapist, robber, mass murderer, ect ect would be up at this hour?" Marissa grinned.

"Hey! I'm the cop around here!"" Ryan said seriousley. Her quietly got out of bed, and grabbed a baseball bat from the hall closet and descended down the cicular staircase. He opened the door, cursing for not having a peephole of some sort.

What he saw was a tiny, thin, threadbare girl. She looked at him for awhile.

"Hi, dad."

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Summer glanced over at her husband. Sleeping like a baby...

Speaking of baby...

Summer crept out of her room and out to the living room, careful not to trip over the damned XBox. She sat down next to the bookshelf, pulling out the lilac picture album. It showed her biological mother and Summer, when Summer was born. There were 5 more picutres like this. Summers mother had intended to chronicle her life with her daughter in this album.

So much for that. Her parents divorced and Summer really never heard from her mom again. Her father remarried to that pill popping vodka loving socialite slut who was half his age Slyviette. It's not like they were ever home anyway. As if money could make up for his absence in life.

Summer slammed the book shut and sighed.

"I still dont understand how your so attached to that album." Seths voice came from behind summer. He was reclined on the couch. Playing XBox.

"Neither do I." Summer said, walking over to cuddle with her husband and watch Captain America kick the shit out of some random bad guy.


	6. Jealousy

Chapter 6

Jealous

"What do you mean you're letting her stay here?" Marissa hissed.

"She's my daughter Marissa! Please, why can't you understand?" Ryan said in a hurt tone.

"Because you have two other beautiful, well brought up daughters. and yet, you want to slay the fatted calf for some random ragamuffin. How do we even know she's yours?" Marissa cried hysterically.

"How can you be so blind! She has my nose, my eyes, my hair! And how can I help Theresa's financial situation? Eddy wasn't the smartest guys on earth." Ryan shot back.

"Don't you love me?" Marissa screamed. She grabbed a robe and slammed the door, walking up to the guest room forgetting about Anna.

Marissa threw open the door, and collapsed in a fit of sobs and hiccups on the floor.

"Marissa?" Came the hushed voice of Anna. The sobs stopped for a second, but returned.

"Oh, it's you!" Marissa bawled. She rocked from side to side, holding her face with her hands. Her hair stuck to her faic and got caught on her lips.

"Marissa! What's wrong?" Anna rushed over and kneeled, placing her hands on Marissa's shoulders.

"No! Stop I dont need you!" Marissa shrieked, roughly pushing Anna away.

"I-I...I'm sorry." Anna trembled.

"Just leave. Just go away." Marissa whispered.

"But where shoudl I.." Anna started.

"Go! Just get out!" Marissa grabbed a ceramic pot and threw it at the door after Anna left.

Marissa took a few deep breaths and collapsed on the bed.

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Anna wandered down to the couch, only to find Ryan and a girl sitting on it.

"Who's this?" Anna said precautiousley.

"My daughter from a previous girlfriend. Her name is Norinne." Norinne waved.

"I'm Anna. I'm here to help out with Ari and Ava. I guess there your stepsisters." Anna sighed uncomfortably. She was having second thoughts about this job.

"Goodnight, Norinne. I think Anna and I need to have a little talk." Ryan kissed his daughters forehead and switched off the lamp.

"Well, I just got off the phone with Seth and Summer. And we decided it would be best if Theresa came and lived with me and Marissa, and you could go to Seth and Summers to help out when they have the triplets."

"Theresa?" Anna pondered.

"Yes, Norinne's mother. I'm not sure how Marissa will take it. I better go check on her." Ryan sighed.

"Yes. I guess I'll camp out with Norinne. By the way, where is Theresa now?" Anna asked.

"She's being held at Trinitas Police Station. According to Officer Aleksandrovicz she was beaten by a gang of loan sharks." Ryan said solemnly.

"Oh." Anna said softly.

The phone rang noisily in the cohen household, interrupting a steamy midnight makeout session.

"Who is calling us at this time of night?" Summer pouted. Seth shrugged. Summer rolled her eyes and buttoned up her juicy couture top.

"Hello, City Morgue. You kill 'em, we chill 'em." Seth said monotonousley.

"Um Seth? It's Ryan." Soon the past events slowly unfolded before Seth.

"Wow. Theresa. I haven't seen her in...ages! Didnt she move into The Vegas?" Seth muttered.

"Yeah. She got kicked out. became a stripper, fell into debt blah blah blah. I just got her call from Trinitas Station." Ryan sighed.

"Trinitas? But thats the station that works with the gangs and mobsters" Seth said as a matter of factly.

"She got beat up by some loan sharks. I have her daughter-our daughter here."

"No fricken' way. Damn. Man, you weren't even at the birth!" Seth said rudely.

"Well, I was a little busy listening to Julie Cooper slash Nichols slash whatever sob her eyes out at your grandfathers funeral. You, however, were busy screwing Summer in the bathroom." Ryan hissed.

"Dude, you knew about that?"

"Sandy was in the stall next to you the whole time takin' a dump Seth." Ryan deadpanned. Summers eyes bulged out.

"I knew it!" She screeched.

"Well, anyway, I'm going to have Theresa be our nanny. I don't know what to tell Anna. I mean, Norinne is my daughter. " Ryan blanched.

"Well....Summers having triplets." Seth said in a hopeful voice.

"Congratulations! How is she?" Ryan said, happy for his bro.

"Um. Hard to say." Seth bit his lip.

"Well what if Anna was our nanny? What do you think of that Summer?" Seth yelled into the other room.

"Hey! That's a great idea. We can talk about our past boyfriends. Who happen to be the same guy!" Summer acted excited.

"I thought you liked her." Seth said sadly.

"I do. Actually it's a good idea." Summer said in a huff.

"oh. Summer thinks its a good idea. So yeah". Seth replied.

If only Ryan knew the consequences of his actions.......


	7. Fred Segal and the Revelations

Anna got settled into the Cohen household quickly. Summer decided she really DID like Anna, and also decided to take her out on a shopping spree, courtesy of her friend Mr. Visa.

"So, Anna. Did you have any boyfriends after you moved away from OC?" Summer asked while Anna tried on some stuff at Fred Segal.

"You know..a few here and then." Anna slipped off her white cotton tee to reveal a lacy black bra. Wowza.

"But nothing serious." summer concluded, while handing Anna a chartruese halter top.

"Oh. Yeah. There was Ben..we were engaged and I was pregnant." Anna stopped short. Why was she telling Summer all this?

Because she was married to the one man Anna could actually trust? I mean, If Seth loved her, she had to be...decent...

"What happened!" Summer said, noticing the lack of husband or child in anna's presence.

"We were coming home from his parents house when a drunk woman slammed into our car. Ben was thrown out of the car, right through the windsheild. I landed on top of him. The baby...didnt make it. " Anna had tears in her eyes.

"Oh Anna. Anna, Anna, Anna. Who was the drunk driver?" Summer hugged Anna and rocked her quietly in the dressing room. Anna bit her lip and then collapsed into a fit of anguish.

"Marissa Cooper! For some reason she was up in LA and was drunk out of her mind. I let her drive off. I didnt want her to get in trouble! She was my friend, before I moved. . Plus, she payed me a great deal of money to keep goddamn quiet about it. " Anna sobbed sadly.

"WHAT? But...Marissa only went to L.A. once...to go to rehab! How could she be drunk?" Summer asked incredulousley.

"I dont know. She had a rough life..I suppose."


End file.
